The Magic Trail

Today was another glorious and beautiful day. As such, I had to take the opportunity to visit the "magic trail". Today the dogs and I ran the whole length of our regular walking route on the trail. I don't know the exact distance but we were gone for almost an hour. When I walk the same distance it takes us maybe an hour and a half.

Monday we also went for a run but for the first time in a long while (I am not even sure if I ran that far since after treatment), we ran to the place where I sprained my ankle after returning from Stanford in July 2004.

I recall walking the distance with great ease prior to the radiosurgery treatment. In fact, I had even ran there on occassion and drug my poor friend for a walking journey there when she was carrying her 1 year old daughter the entire way. It did not seem too long for me at the time but now I realize she must have had incredible stamina as carrying a 15-20 pound child strapped to her chest in the heat must have been back braking work not to mention highly astute balance!

It felt good to run. I can run without a walking stick now as I am able to walk fairly well after completing the run. If you recall a year prior when I wrote about running, after running for 15 to 20 minutes I could barely walk because I was so disoriented! I stumbled all over the trail for a good 10 minutes and experienced double vision!

Thankfully that does not happen to me now but I do still have some extrene eye jiggling (Oscillopsia). I have learned to keep my focus forward and to look down at the trail about 3 to 5 feet in front of me the whole time. When I look up and straight ahead, the trail bounces around too much and I cannot make out faces or distances well.

Still it really feels nice to get to this point and I am almost addicted to challenging myself on being able to run the whole distance or as far as I can go. I can't rollerblade, ice skate, or cross country ski anymore but I can run and I am proud to have that much. God has given me my legs and I mind as well use them.

You are probably wondering why I call the trail the "magic trail". I came up with that name last fall when I returned from Arizona. I went for a walk and it was getting dark out. Despite the approaching darkness, I was still able to walk and it was exhilerating to feel the fall breeze wisk through my hair and feel the coolness on my face. All around me the dried leaves from the trees bustled in the wind and came to rest on the ground beside me. If I had not known better, I would swear that I could hear the wind. At the same time I gazed upon the stars beginning to appear, the moonlight in its glory, and the black silhouttees of the trees against the faint trace of the sun which was nearly gone. It was a very spiritual moment as I stood in comtemplation of my life. I felt like dancing for joy that I was still alive and able to savor that moment.

I have had many magical moments like that on the trail. I have seen brilliant sunsets, rainbows, the silver glinting of rain hitting the pond in the afternoon sun, majestic snow covered mountains, the full cycle of the seasons, and life bursting before my eyes over the past 2 years.

When I became deaf, when I was on the trail I had forgotten about my deafness. It seemed routine to my brain to hear sounds such as birds chirping and the ripple of the current in the creek. If I could see it I could hear it. It took several months to realize that I really was not hearing the cars that I would see pass by at the great field or the old pond.

Having NF2 has afforded me the luxury to experience the magic trail to its full capacity. The wildlife I have seen at rare opportunities include: coyotes, deer, a beaver, a bobcat, mallard ducks, wood ducks, blue herring, frogs, Baltimore Orioles, an owl, and many other birds. In addition, each season has its own distinguishing botanical scenery. It has been a delight to see this trail evolve and change. I do a great deal of thinking on the trail and it has given me a place of refuge and solace.